Half now you're whole

Huge female gay icons, I have seen a few. There's always a curiosity to see what they are all about. Why they are so idolised and loved, and if they are any good. They also tend to come with one name. Their ubiquity is such that you just know. Of the ones I have seen, some are lightweight and others are legendary. Let's sneak in Amy. She's junior grade, but well on her way. I think it's safe to say that both Kylie and Madonna have earned their stripes. Diana. Dolly. And now, I feel I have completed a trifecta: years ago, I saw Liza Minnelli at the Royal Albert Hall; then in February I saw Lorna Luft on stage with Rufus. Both Judy's daughters: no small triumph. And now, the crowning glory. The gay diva to end all gay divas. Streisand.

Before I get too heavily into this, I just want to clarify that I am not actually an obsessive fan. I'm not being negative, because clearly she is an extraordinary woman, it's just that she's never yet been top of my list. It crossed my mind a few years ago that listening to her music was one of those things that one grew into as a gay man, like a propensity for drag or sustained bitterness. But, the truth is there are a large number of her songs that I do particularly like now. Anything that has involved Barry Gibb, especially Woman in love and Guilty. Send in the clowns. Somewhere. No more tears. Comin' in and out of your life. You don't bring me flowers. And (sort of) The way we were. 

As I said, I have a curiosity about these people, the legends. When I heard Barbra was touring again, expense be damned, I realised I just had to see her. The words of a dear friend, when suggesting a group outing to go and see Diana Ross, rang in my ears: "one just doesn't know how long these divas can keep on going". And so it was that I found myself on Sunday night at The O2... the Dome of course... in Greenwich. It was my first visit there since it was made-over from White Elephant to, in the words of Kylie, White Diamond. I was totally wowed - it has been transformed into the most sensational venue. The nearest visual comparison I have is those dull political bits in the recent Star Wars movies when the council meetings take place, with endless tiers of nodding aliens. I mean, there were literally thousands of people there. In comfortable seats, with endless bars and food stops. It was like the world's biggest cinema. It also looks gorgeous, the aisles all illuminated from above like strips of light separating sections of the crowd.

We sat down and surprisingly shortly afterwards the lights fell and suddenly there she was. A symphony in Donna Karan and straightened hair. The crowd went bananas. And then she sang.

If one sees an artist with a significant back catalogue, there's that tendency they have to please hardcore fans by singing a number from early on in their career, "I haven't performed this since 1967" or "this was a song that was cut from the movie but I am singing it tonight as a special treat", that kind of thing. She did quite a lot of that sort of song. I stayed too long at the fair, for example, plus several numbers from Funny Girl. I suspect that if one has been seeing her movies for decades and went to an original production on the London Stage, one would have an attachment to those songs, but I didn't really know them, so they don't have such an emotional suckerpunch. I think it made me rather dispassionate about the experience.

For the acolytes that idolised and loved her, it was a one-way trip to heaven. There was a man sitting next to me weeping openly for much of the show. I was unclear whether that was because of the noise Barbra was making, or the realisation that he was seeing her in the flesh. I suspect it was the latter, because when she was great she was staggering, but when she was bad, let's say it now because this is controversial, it was only alright. I was in no mood to be indulgent because I am not so invested her as a star. So here's the truth: her voice cracked repeatedly during the show where she reached for musical ranges that were once hers but are no longer within reach. It was a shame. Of course, she knew this, so would usually follow this noise by bringing it back to safer territory immediately afterwards or swooping and wowing the crowd with the long, high notes which have a purity unmatched. That was, at times, breathtaking. That is what the fuss is all about.

Oh, here's a gripe. About half an hour in, she went off for a little break and left us with these four guys she had picked up from Broadway who sang to us. They had taken the place of Il Divo who toured with her in the USA. I guess it is one thing to hear Il Divo because they are very successful in their own right, though to be honest, their kind of music is abhorent to me. I loathe powerfully that dreadful orchestrated re-packaged crap they peddle with a venom and passion. It's the total antithesis of anything credible and artistic in my book. Give me Dannii Minogue. No. Give me Lisa Scott-Lee before I will accept Il EvilDoer. And these four dudes who we were left with were not quite as interesting as Il Divo. And they sang FOUR SONGS. In the middle of a Barbra Streisand concert that in some cases people had paid £500 to see. That's $1000! If it were me having coughed up that much, I would have had a breakdown.

But, let's get back to the good stuff. She chatted with the audience between each song, and it was a delight. Priceless. Half of the reason most people were there. The engagement with the crowd is where she proved what a true pro she is. She came across so naturally, and was actually very funny. The section where each of the four Broadway dudes spoke about their experiences over the years with Barbra, which could have been cloying and ghastly, was well-scripted and mocked Barbra, which the Brits loved. "My first experience of Barbra was seeing The Way We Were aged 15" -beat- "on DVD with my parents". "Barbra, the first movie I ever saw with you in it was..." -beat- "Meet The Fockers". And so on. It should be recorded that JN, my Barbra co-passenger and I started absorbing her strange inflections and speech mannerisms such that I am only just recovering my usual received pronunciation.

People! People who need Barbra!

The best bits were Unusual way, My shining hour, People and The way we were, and she finished with a fantastic Smile (not the Lily Allen one) which banished memories of the rasping deficiencies. Overall, it was an amazing experience to see someone who is such a legend, and I don't regret it for one moment, but here comes a true confession:

I enjoyed Amy Winehouse more.

Comments

[xolondon]

"A symphony in Donna Karan and straightened hair"

Your finest line evah on this blog. That review was, you guessed it, like buttah!

[TRICKY]

Those nails. I didn't even mention them!

[Tony]

Aw, bless ya - you held writing this back so I didn't spoil myself. Heh.

"...and she finished with a fantastic Smile (not the Lily Allen one)..."

Getting confused "what's so funny" looks from colleagues at my reaction to reading this at my desk! Hahahahaha. If only, eh?

Highlights for me were:
a) the carpet. Haha. Go Babs - carpeting concrete in true Diva style;
b) 'You Don't Bring Me Flowers' - that had the hairs standing on end all over and I glimpsed the oft-described Streisand genius;
c) her description to the man in the front row of why she never sings, and "certainly won't be singing tonight" 'Woman In Love' ("My biggest hit - meh, I don't *like* that song - I'll choose what I'm singing, this isn't Barbra comes to your house and sings just for you, honey!").

Particularly enjoyed her using the (ev)Il Divo-lite boys to cover her necessary change from 'black DK dress with gold trim' into 'black DK dress with gold trm'.

Great review sir.

[TRICKY]

I had friends there on Wednesday who said she responded to the request for Woman In Love with "listen to it on your home stereo" or similar. They didn't like that response much. But this was the Barbra show, and it was all about her and I think everyone pretty much knew it would be that way from the word go.

Hope you enjoyed... and felt you got your money's worth?

[Tony]

Yeah, it was definitely worth £100, not sure I'd have felt that way had I paid £500 though...

It's funny, at the show I was enjoying her banter, but found myself thinking "if you keep talking so much there'll only be time for about 4 songs", but then looking back at the setlist she did fit in loads of songs.

Mika/Amy/Babs - one week, three VERY different performances!

[TRICKY]

She did, but not many big hits. I guess the audience was all die-hard fans who wanted to hear the material from the 60s and 70s and she was keen to sing them, so... what Barbra wants, the audience gets. And she didn't want Woman In Love.

I loved Amy so much I am going back for seconds in November.

[Tony]

Nice one! Hopefully not surrounded by talky people this time.

[derek]

are you OK? extra busy?? missing your
news and gossip enormously